Children who need adoptive homes

The profile of children needing adoptive homes has changed dramatically over the last twenty years.

It is now very rare for babies to be placed for adoption, although it can happen from time to time. Children who are seeking adoption are those from families which have broken down, or where the child has been removed for their own safety due to emotional or physical neglect or physical and/or sexual abuse. Children are usually already in the care of local authorities and living with temporary foster parents. Children may need to be placed individually or in sibling groups, according to their needs. Some will need to retain some ongoing contact with birth relatives. Many children have varying degrees of special needs due to the experiences they have had, but ALL need stability and the knowledge that they are loved and valued by their new parents.

Our criteria for selecting prospective adoptive parents.

To adopt a child through the Catholic Children’s Society (Westminster) you must be:

• Over 21 years of age
• Married, if you are a couple
• Single, living on your own
• Able to show that you can provide a stable, loving home for a child
• Able to meet a child’s racial, cultural and religious needs

YOU DO NOT HAVE TO BE A CATHOLIC TO BE CONSIDERED AS AN ADOPTER

Preparation and Placement

We run Preparation groups for people who are thinking about adoption. This helps people to explore issues and ask detailed questions. If, after the group preparation you wish to proceed, you will be visited several times by one of our social workers in your home and have interviews in our offices. The process will take about five months after which your application will be considered by an independent adoption panel, which you will be able to attend.

Once approved as an adopter, you will play an active role in drawing up your profile which will then be circulated to agencies that have children for adoption.

Our support does not end when the adoption is made legal. We visit families with new children and run several services to support children and their adopters if there are problems.

Typical adoptive placements

Sally and Derek
Sally and Derek are English and they have two birth sons of 16 and 21. They adopted Adam three years ago when he was 7. He had been ‘looked after’ for most of his life and had been in several foster placements. It was important that his new parents were committed to him keeping in touch with his 5 brothers and sisters. When he moved to his adoptive home he had difficulty trusting adults and his behaviour at home and at school was challenging. However, over time he has settled well and is making good progress at school and in his family. It has been hard work, but Sally and Derek feel he is now very much part of their family.

David and Vivienne
David is English and Vivienne African-Caribbean. They adopted siblings Duncan and Edward, ages 4 and 3, who had been abused and neglected by their parents, who had been in care themselves. Duncan and Edward had been in many foster homes, were very insecure and could not trust David and Vivienne’s commitment. Each night they would check to make sure that their bags hadn’t been packed for another move and that the breakfast table was laid for their breakfast. After two years of patience and love, the boys are no longer fearful and have settled down.

Elaine and Peter
Elaine is English and is married to Peter, who was brought up in England by Polish parents. They adopted Joseph, who is 10, five years ago. His father, who was thought to be Polish, is not in touch but once a year Joseph sees his birth mother, who has longstanding mental health problems. Initially this contact upset Joseph, but Elaine and Peter realised how important it was to persevere with contact and to support Joseph by showing him they understood his sadness. Over time they all agree that the contact has helped Joseph understand about his background and really settle in his adoptive family.

Cheryl
Cheryl is African-Caribbean. She was married in her 30’s but then divorced. She was keen to adopt but was unsure that she would be considered suitable and was concerned about the responsibilities involved in being a single parent. Gabriel had spent 4 years in care before being placed with her. Cheryl’s family have been very supportive and she is coping very well and enjoying being a mother to Gabriel.

Bill and Margaret
Bill and Margaret are Irish. They adopted Michael, who is 9, seven years ago. When Michael had settled in at school, they decided to try and adopt again. It took a little while to be matched with a suitable child, but 18 months ago Saskia (now aged 5) was placed with them. Saskia had suffered physical and sexual abuse and she may require therapy in the future to help her with these experiences. Although during the first year with her new family, she was anxious and insecure, she has now begun to relax and has grown in confidence. Bill and Margaret are delighted to see her beginning to enjoy their family life.